More Phony Lead-ins

Good evening, Lyndonville. Earlier today, a plane returning from New York's Kennedy Airport crashed on lift-off. The plane was carrying 45 passengers, including two Lyndon State College professors, whom escaped injury. In all, five of the TWA's passengers were killed, the rest injured. More details at 11.

West Fairlee's town meeting this morning came to the conclusion of raising the property tax 10%. This means that the average homeowner's rates will go up 200 dollars a year. This huge increase in taxes will go to building up West Fairlee's pathetic park.

Good Morning USA! Breaking News! West Fairlee's city council meeting concluded with a 10% increase in property taxes. Homeowners can expect a 200 dollar increase in taxes each year. This money will go to a project to increase the size of West Fairlee's park.

LSC freshman Randy Wilkinson, found passed out in a residence hall basement is facing charges of underage drinking yesterday at 7:20AM. Wilkinson had apparently fallen four stories down the laundry chute and received a concussion. He was hospitalized with head injuries but isn't in critical condition. Wilkinson's court date will...

Good Afternoon. This morning an LSC freshman was found unconcious in his dorm romm's laundry room. The student, Randy Wilkinson had apparently fallen down his fourth floor laundry chute while drunk. Wilkinson is being hospitalized with a concussion, but his condition is not serious. Wilkinson awoke to being charged with underage drinking....